Celluloid Heroes

This epic takes us to the crusades, where we encounter a young blacksmith (Orlando Bloom, who seems to have a thing for acting in epics) just as he learns that a passing lord is his father.

The lord invites him to come on a crusade to Jerusalem with him, but he declines, opting to stay where he is, and that he does until the local priest comes to talk about his recently deceased wife. That's when our young blacksmith spots his wife's necklace on the priest and kills him, then promptly takes off after his father.

Read All of "Kingdom of Heaven (2005) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 30, 2006 in Drama

In this latest offering from Dreamworks Animation, they're making quite an effort at stealing the thunder from Pixar. Actually, they probably couldn't do quite as good a job if Pixar's latest effort (the less-than-stellar Cars) wasn't as poor an outing. Nonetheless, this is quite good.

This is the tale of RJ (voiced by Bruce Willis), a scavenging raccoon who decides to raid a bear's stash and ends up waking him up in the process. The bear doesn't like this too much, and the food gets smashed by a truck, so RJ ends up having to replace all the food - in less than week - so he runs to the only source available: The tract homes springing up nearby, and the animals that are being displaced and have just woken up from their own hibernation to help him get the job done.

Read All of "Over the Hedge (2006) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 29, 2006 in Family

The Accidental Tourist refers to a series of books written by character Macon Leary (William Hurt), who helps business travelers to make their travel experience a bit better by giving them tips, such as to take packets of laundry detergent so that they can pack lightly yet still have everything they need at their disposal.

He returns from one of his trips to find his wife is leaving him. A year after their son died, she has decided that she cannot handle it any more and needs to get away. Being essentially destroyed, he simply moves on with his life. He fights for a while and then gives into the advances of a dog trainer who seems interested enough to pursue him (played by Geena Davis).

Read All of "The Accidental Tourist (1988) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 26, 2006 in Drama

This second (mostly) live-action movie starring the fat cat is (surprisingly) a bit better than the first. The animation of Garfield is actually quite a bit better than the first. That isn't the surprising part, though. What is entertaining is that the story moves along at a good clip, and without getting bogged down in specifics, it actually entertains throughout.

Prince the Twelfth is a noble cat, from a long line of cats who inhabit the castle, and finds that he has inherited the castle itself when his owner passes. Unfortunately the human who had expected to get the proceeds doesn't seem to care much for this development, and has decided to take matters into his own hands.

Read All of "Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties (2006) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 25, 2006 in Family

This retelling of the 1953 classic has a big budget and a lot of computer effects, and in general does a very good job. Tom Cruise may not be my first choice for an action hero, but he doesn't do too badly here. I think that's probably because the tale is told by what's happening around him and it doesn't depend too much on what he's doing.

Ray Ferrier (Cruise) is a New Jersey mechanic who seems to be fighting with life. His wife has moved on and his kids aren't too far from doing the same. But this weekend they are staying with him, so perhaps something will change. When Ray tries to get his son Robbie Justin Chatwin to play a game of catch, the ball goes through the window instead. I guess it won't be this weekend after all.

Read All of "War of the Worlds (2005) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 24, 2006 in Science Fiction

Martin Lawrence has had an interesting road, going from a bit of the wild side to this relatively tame film that's perhaps even a little too sappy even for the Disney crowd.

Here he plays Coach Roy McCormick, who seems to be famous for nothing much more than having a lot of endorsement deals, but apparently once upon a time he was actually a good basketball coach. Now he just throws tantrums, and his latest one has nearly cost him his lucrative lifestyle.

Read All of "Rebound (2005) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 19, 2006 in Family

When family has an unexpected health problem (like a heart attack) in the middle of the night, and you need to check on them, you may need family to help out. You can't just leave the kids with neighbors, or call someone to watch them. Enter Uncle Buck.

Buck Russell (John Candy) is the relative that no one likes to admit they have, and he just happens to be the one who might happen to come through when you need someone the most. Sure, he's a bit rough around the edges, but no one can make pancakes like Uncle Buck.

Read All of "Uncle Buck (1989) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 19, 2006 in Family

This remake of the 1972 classic The Poseidon Adventure is better than most remakes. It's certainly better than the 2005 made-for-television version that had terrorists wanting to sink the ship, instead of the rogue wave capsizing the luxury ocean liner.

Don't get me wrong - the original is still better by a longshot. But this one at least does it justice. Where the classic had a good tale to tell, this one perhaps falls a bit short. But where it at least made up for that shortcoming, it definitely had some action all the way through, and one thing that impressed me was that people died. Who would have thought?

Read All of "Poseidon (2006) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 15, 2006 in Action

Back when Drew Barrymore was trying to figure out what she wanted to do with her life, she made this movie about being a bad girl - only she wasn't that bad. She did it mostly with mental games, and though there is a certain sexual overtone to the movie, there's actually very little sex in it. Perhaps that means she was over her bad girl phase, since she hit at such a young age.

Or perhaps she was just in need of a paycheck, so she took the opportunity to jump at whatever came along. After all, this was probably the best of all the Poison Ivy movies that were made, so it's certainly good that she picked the first, rather than one of the others, but you can't really give her credit for thinking ahead, when there was no guarantee that they would have ever made another one, so who knows?

Read All of "Poison Ivy (1992) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 9, 2006 in Thriller

Andy Stitzer (Steve Carell) doesn't have too many friends. He lives alone in an apartment filled with all sorts of collectible dolls and comic books and video games and all the sorts of things you might have if you lived on your own until you were 40. He tries to pass himself off as one of the guys, but they all suspect something just isn't right, and they just can't put their finger on it. They suspect he is gay or a serial killer. But it's something much worse.

You see, Andy is a virgin. So the guys at the store make a pact to try and take care of Andy's little "problem". In fact, everyone tries to take care of Andy's problem.

Read All of "The 40 Year Old Virgin (2005) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 8, 2006 in Comedy

Before Denzel Washington became a household name he starred in this film about an up-and-coming LA district attorney who is being haunted by a criminal who he put away a number of years before (and who, coincidentally, started his rise up the political ladder).

The criminal, Earl Talbott Blake (John Lithgow), recently escaped from prison, and in a brilliant move, shot one of his escape buddies and burned the body to pass him off as himself, so that he could operate under-the radar. What better than to have people think you are dead?

Read All of "Ricochet (1991) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 8, 2006 in Drama

Diane Lane stars as lovesick Sarah Nolan, who just can't seem to get her life on track after her husband left her for a (significantly) younger woman. Now her sister is pushing her to try dating via the Internet, and her first try nets her a date... with her dad.

Meanwhile, her dad actually seems to be doing pretty well at this Internet dating thing - at least, he typically seems to have a number of women who he is hanging out with, which doesn't help Sarah feel better at all. As it turns out, he's just trying to pass the time, because after spending more than 40 years with the love of his life, he knows he cannot hope to compete.

Read All of "Must Love Dogs (2005) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 8, 2006 in Romance

This epic takes us to the crusades, where we encounter a young blacksmith (Orlando Bloom, who seems to have a thing for acting in epics) just as he learns that a passing lord is his father.

The lord invites him to come on a crusade to Jerusalem with him, but he declines, opting to stay where he is, and that he does until the local priest comes to talk about his recently deceased wife. That's when our young blacksmith spots his wife's necklace on the priest and kills him, then promptly takes off after his father.

Read All of "Kingdom of Heaven (2005) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 30, 2006 in Drama

In this latest offering from Dreamworks Animation, they're making quite an effort at stealing the thunder from Pixar. Actually, they probably couldn't do quite as good a job if Pixar's latest effort (the less-than-stellar Cars) wasn't as poor an outing. Nonetheless, this is quite good.

This is the tale of RJ (voiced by Bruce Willis), a scavenging raccoon who decides to raid a bear's stash and ends up waking him up in the process. The bear doesn't like this too much, and the food gets smashed by a truck, so RJ ends up having to replace all the food - in less than week - so he runs to the only source available: The tract homes springing up nearby, and the animals that are being displaced and have just woken up from their own hibernation to help him get the job done.

Read All of "Over the Hedge (2006) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 29, 2006 in Family

The Accidental Tourist refers to a series of books written by character Macon Leary (William Hurt), who helps business travelers to make their travel experience a bit better by giving them tips, such as to take packets of laundry detergent so that they can pack lightly yet still have everything they need at their disposal.

He returns from one of his trips to find his wife is leaving him. A year after their son died, she has decided that she cannot handle it any more and needs to get away. Being essentially destroyed, he simply moves on with his life. He fights for a while and then gives into the advances of a dog trainer who seems interested enough to pursue him (played by Geena Davis).

Read All of "The Accidental Tourist (1988) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 26, 2006 in Drama

This second (mostly) live-action movie starring the fat cat is (surprisingly) a bit better than the first. The animation of Garfield is actually quite a bit better than the first. That isn't the surprising part, though. What is entertaining is that the story moves along at a good clip, and without getting bogged down in specifics, it actually entertains throughout.

Prince the Twelfth is a noble cat, from a long line of cats who inhabit the castle, and finds that he has inherited the castle itself when his owner passes. Unfortunately the human who had expected to get the proceeds doesn't seem to care much for this development, and has decided to take matters into his own hands.

Read All of "Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties (2006) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 25, 2006 in Family

This retelling of the 1953 classic has a big budget and a lot of computer effects, and in general does a very good job. Tom Cruise may not be my first choice for an action hero, but he doesn't do too badly here. I think that's probably because the tale is told by what's happening around him and it doesn't depend too much on what he's doing.

Ray Ferrier (Cruise) is a New Jersey mechanic who seems to be fighting with life. His wife has moved on and his kids aren't too far from doing the same. But this weekend they are staying with him, so perhaps something will change. When Ray tries to get his son Robbie Justin Chatwin to play a game of catch, the ball goes through the window instead. I guess it won't be this weekend after all.

Read All of "War of the Worlds (2005) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 24, 2006 in Science Fiction

Martin Lawrence has had an interesting road, going from a bit of the wild side to this relatively tame film that's perhaps even a little too sappy even for the Disney crowd.

Here he plays Coach Roy McCormick, who seems to be famous for nothing much more than having a lot of endorsement deals, but apparently once upon a time he was actually a good basketball coach. Now he just throws tantrums, and his latest one has nearly cost him his lucrative lifestyle.

Read All of "Rebound (2005) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 19, 2006 in Family

When family has an unexpected health problem (like a heart attack) in the middle of the night, and you need to check on them, you may need family to help out. You can't just leave the kids with neighbors, or call someone to watch them. Enter Uncle Buck.

Buck Russell (John Candy) is the relative that no one likes to admit they have, and he just happens to be the one who might happen to come through when you need someone the most. Sure, he's a bit rough around the edges, but no one can make pancakes like Uncle Buck.

Read All of "Uncle Buck (1989) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 19, 2006 in Family

This remake of the 1972 classic The Poseidon Adventure is better than most remakes. It's certainly better than the 2005 made-for-television version that had terrorists wanting to sink the ship, instead of the rogue wave capsizing the luxury ocean liner.

Don't get me wrong - the original is still better by a longshot. But this one at least does it justice. Where the classic had a good tale to tell, this one perhaps falls a bit short. But where it at least made up for that shortcoming, it definitely had some action all the way through, and one thing that impressed me was that people died. Who would have thought?

Read All of "Poseidon (2006) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 15, 2006 in Action

Back when Drew Barrymore was trying to figure out what she wanted to do with her life, she made this movie about being a bad girl - only she wasn't that bad. She did it mostly with mental games, and though there is a certain sexual overtone to the movie, there's actually very little sex in it. Perhaps that means she was over her bad girl phase, since she hit at such a young age.

Or perhaps she was just in need of a paycheck, so she took the opportunity to jump at whatever came along. After all, this was probably the best of all the Poison Ivy movies that were made, so it's certainly good that she picked the first, rather than one of the others, but you can't really give her credit for thinking ahead, when there was no guarantee that they would have ever made another one, so who knows?

Read All of "Poison Ivy (1992) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 9, 2006 in Thriller

Andy Stitzer (Steve Carell) doesn't have too many friends. He lives alone in an apartment filled with all sorts of collectible dolls and comic books and video games and all the sorts of things you might have if you lived on your own until you were 40. He tries to pass himself off as one of the guys, but they all suspect something just isn't right, and they just can't put their finger on it. They suspect he is gay or a serial killer. But it's something much worse.

You see, Andy is a virgin. So the guys at the store make a pact to try and take care of Andy's little "problem". In fact, everyone tries to take care of Andy's problem.

Read All of "The 40 Year Old Virgin (2005) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 8, 2006 in Comedy

Before Denzel Washington became a household name he starred in this film about an up-and-coming LA district attorney who is being haunted by a criminal who he put away a number of years before (and who, coincidentally, started his rise up the political ladder).

The criminal, Earl Talbott Blake (John Lithgow), recently escaped from prison, and in a brilliant move, shot one of his escape buddies and burned the body to pass him off as himself, so that he could operate under-the radar. What better than to have people think you are dead?

Read All of "Ricochet (1991) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 8, 2006 in Drama

Diane Lane stars as lovesick Sarah Nolan, who just can't seem to get her life on track after her husband left her for a (significantly) younger woman. Now her sister is pushing her to try dating via the Internet, and her first try nets her a date... with her dad.

Meanwhile, her dad actually seems to be doing pretty well at this Internet dating thing - at least, he typically seems to have a number of women who he is hanging out with, which doesn't help Sarah feel better at all. As it turns out, he's just trying to pass the time, because after spending more than 40 years with the love of his life, he knows he cannot hope to compete.

Read All of "Must Love Dogs (2005) Review" »
Posted by Chad Everett on July 8, 2006 in Romance