When a renegade Russian submarine captain (Sean Connery) disappears into the North Atlantic with Russia’s latest technical marvel, it is at first assumed that he intends to start a war. That is, after all, what the Red Octoberwas designed to do. But at least one person, Jack Ryan (Alec Baldwin), believes differently.

He has studied Marko Ramius, and he has even met him once before, and he doesn’t think that he would do something like that. In fact, Jack thinks that he’s trying to defect. There are just two problems with that. First, anyone with a multi-billion dollar war machine may do just about anything that they want. And second, this machine just happens to have a super-secret caterpillar drive that means they can’t be tracked in any traditional way, so finding him is another thing entirely.

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Danny O’Shea (Rick Moranis) was always the last kid picked when it came to just about anything, but especially in football. This fact was always made worse by the fact that his brother, Kevin, wasn’t just Kevin, he was the great Kevin O’Shea (Ed O’Neill), who won the Heisman Trophy in college and had an amazing career.

Now he’s a car salesman, but he’s still the great Kevin O’Shea, and his Cowboys are the team to be on. When Danny’s daughter Becky, also know as The Icebox (Shawna Waldron) is denied a spot on the team, everyone knows it is because she is a girl. After all, The Icebox is the best player in town – what else could it be?

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This movie tells the life of Johnny Cash through a series of clips that give us a glimpse of what are presumably the important moments that he encounters.

When the movie opens, Johnny (Joaquin Phoenix) is just about to go onstage at Folsom Prison – we’ll find out more about just why he is doing so later.

But before he does, he starts to day dream while looking at a table saw, and that takes him back to 1944, where he recalls his brother, Jack.

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Things aren’t going well for Rafi (Uma Thurman). She’s just come out of a relationship, and now she’s met a wonderful new guy, but it turns out he’s younger than she is. A lot younger than she is. Fourteen years, to be exact.

To make matters worse, she is a career woman, and he isn’t much for a career. She tries to get him to paint more, but he just doesn’t know what he wants to do yet. He does seem to love her though, at least that is genuine. But when it turns out that her therapist is his mother, maybe it would just be easier to find someone else.

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Marty the Zebra (Chris Rock) dreams of one day leaving the Central Park Zoo and exploring “the wild”. Then on his tenth birthday, the penguins – the psychotic penguins, I should say – dig a hole into his cage, leaving him the perfect opportunity to escape (assuming he can fit his zebra body through the small penguin-sized hole).

That night, Melman the Giraffe (David Schwimmer) notices that Marty is missing, and he convinces Alex the Lion (Ben Stiller) and Gloria the Hippo (Jada Pinkett Smith) to go looking for him.

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Young Chris Brander (Ryan Reynolds) has a problem. He has been best friends with Jamie Palamino (Amy Smart) for years, but it seems like that’s all they will ever be. He’s stuck in The Friend Zone.

Now they’re graduating, so he’s going to write her a special note in her yearbook. The only problem is one of those jerk jocks gets a hold of it and reads the note to everyone at the party, and he’s humiliated again. He jumps on his bike and rides off.

10 years later, he is in LA and his boss gives him an ultimatum. Sign (another) bratty superstar to a contract, or find somewhere else to work. It just so happens that he’s been dating this one, so they jet off towards Paris to see what he can do.

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You might think that The Dukes of Hazzard return in this big screen fiasco, but you’d be wrong. About the only thing that remains the same between this movie and the original The Dukes of Hazzard is the name, the name of the players and the General Lee.

The Duke boys do shoot those arrows that explode when they hit something, and the place names are the same.

Oh, and you could almost count Willie Nelson, because he used to play with Waylon Jennings. Willie plays the new Uncle Jesse, and Waylon used be The Balladeer. But that’s about as close as it gets, and that’s also the end of the comparison. Sad, really.

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Rose Feller (Toni Collette) has led a sensible life, but she has a wild side – it’s in her closet. Her shoes, to be precise. Meanwhile, her sister Maggie (Cameron Diaz) is a bit less sensible, but she doesn’t have quite the shoe collection of her sister. Oh, she’d like it, but she just doesn’t have it. So when she’s kicked out of her own apartment for coming home late one too many times (and too drunk), she goes to live with Rose.

The only problem is that she sleeps with Rose’s boyfriend – and coworker – which means that Rose has had enough, too. That means that Maggie takes off for new digs, and that is when she finds out about a stack of letters that her grandmother sent her (and Rose) that her father and stepmother have kept hidden. So instead of going to New York like she had planned, she goes to Florida to visit her grandmother. Enter Ella (Shirley MacLaine).

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Jonathan Rivers (Michael Keaton) is one of those people who just seems to have everything – his business is going well, he has a beautiful wife, and even his relationship with his ex-wife seems to be a good one. There just aren’t that many people like him in this world. So one day when his current wife disappears, then turns up missing, and eventually is found down the river, it shatters his amazing life. But it gets worse.

Because not long after this happens, he notices someone watching his house, then watching his office, so he confronts him, and finds out about “EVP” – Electronic Voice Phenomena – where the disembodied spirits of those who have passed try and communicate with those who are still here.

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Baird Academy is a prep school for forming young men, and though they claim to be forming the future leaders of the country, it appears to be populated almost entirely by those who you would never want to be in such a position. The one possible exception is Charlie Simms (Chris O’Donnell), who hails not from the old money of the Northeast, but from a tiny burg in Oregon and is attending Baird on a scholarship. He doesn’t fit into the “in” crowd, and perhaps he shouldn’t want to.

Yet Charlie is intimidated by them and their money nonetheless, so when he sees several of the boys setting up for a gag that sprays paint on the headmaster’s car, he naturally assumes that he shouldn’t be a snitch and tell what he knows, even though the headmaster offers to get him a free ride into Harvard. It’s even less tempting when one of the other boys who was with him (played by Philip Seymour Hoffman) approaches him as a “friend” and says that they don’t do that.

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